"Let go of who you think you're supposed to be and embrace who you are"
Brene Brown

 

There are times in our lives when our inner critic raises his/her voice making us believe that we are supposed to be something different that we are. The holidays are one of those times when we feel the pressure to have everything perfect, at all times.  We want to make sure we don't forget anyone on our list, or even someone we forgot to put on our list. We want the house to look festive and everything to be put in its place in case someone stops by with goodies. Speaking of goodies, we also want to have great cookies to share with our family and friends. In this blog, I will be sharing ways to make things "just right" without the stress and pressure we normally put on ourselves.

First, let's discuss some practical ways to prepare for the holidays.  The house is one of the primary symbols that show the neighborhood that, yes, we are celebrating this year.  Take a deep breath and tell yourself that you do not need Santa and all of his reindeer on your roof this year nor do you need the life size Nativity scene in your front yard!  In fact, my fake pre-lit Christmas tree has been up since Thanksgiving without any decorations!  Yes, people have stopped by and yes, I have felt the need to point out that there are no ornaments.  We all laugh at how crazy life is and we move on. 

Baking cookies is a favorite past time at many homes during the holidays.  Baking can really stress us out when we are busy.  Suddenly, we are mixing dough, burning grandma’s special recipe sugar cookies and yelling at our kids for not putting the sprinkles on correctly!  Now, everyone is unhappy, stressed and we still don’t have any cookies.  Repeat after me, “it is perfectly okay to buy the dough, the icing and sprinkles.”  If I, the daughter of a baker, can do this, so can you.  Maybe they won’t taste “just like grandma’s cookies”, but everyone will be happy and you will have enjoyed the time with your family, which is what it is really all about.

What’s for dinner?  That is something we hear almost nightly from someone in our home.  During the hustle and bustle of the holidays just keeping up with work, getting kids where they need to be, shopping for everyone on our list, decorating and baking is enough to fill our days from morning until night.  We don’t always have time to make dinner.  So, get out the frozen pizza and the bag of salad and call it a day.  Give yourself a break, put your feet up and have the kids throw the paper plates away! 

You may be asking yourself what these things have to do with being yourself or about being good enough.  It has everything to do with it.  Who are you being with your family, friends and the rest of the world?  Are you trying to impress anyone, keep up with your neighbors or buy the perfect gift?  This holiday season I challenge you to spend a minute each morning thinking about, who you are and what you have to celebrate this year.  Many of us would describe ourselves as happy and fun to be around, but when we reflect on how we have behaved with our families or friends we realize that we have been grumpy, stressed out and short tempered.  So, send out those pre-printed holiday cards or e-cards, have your kids wrap gifts (no matter how they look) and leave the house cluttered another night.  When you live authentically and only do what you can, you give others permission to do the same.  Now, that’s a gift that keeps on giving!

Breathe in this holiday season and exhale joy and peace.

Tune in next week for part II of “Being Good Enough” when I share some thoughts on how being who you are (which really is enough) and seeing others for who they really are (which is enough) really can make for a beautiful holiday.

 

Peace & Gratitude.